Sardarji proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made; they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one. He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "21st and *again* bare feet!"
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Sardarji calls Air India. "How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?"
Just a sec", comes an answer.
"Thank you." says the Sardarji and hangs up!
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Our Sardarji was filling up an application form for a job. He promptly filled the columns titled NAME, AGE, and ADDRESS etc. Then he came to the column Salary Expected: He was not sure as to what to be filled there.
After much thought he wrote: Yes
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The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 22 days, he would loose 45 kilos. At the end of 22 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
"What's the problem? asked the doctor.
"I'm 245 kilometers from home."
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Sardars Hari Singh and Gani Singh got fed up with the Indian Government and decided to blow up the parliament. They took 2 bombs, put them in a suitcase in the front seat of their car and set off. Hari Singh asks "What happens if the bombs blast off now".
Gani Singh says "Don't worry. I have a spare bomb in the booty.
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Sardars Hari Singh and Gani Singh walked toward each other on a country road. Hari Singh carried a burlap bag over his shoulder.
"Hey Bhai," Gani Singh drawled, "Whats in the bag?"
"Chickens," was the reply.
"If I guess how many, can I have one?"
"You can have both of them."
"OK, Five?"
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Sardarji is at a feast arranged by the Queen of England. One of the dignitaries present requests the Queen, "Pass the Wine thou devine!
Sardarji thinks to himself - "How poetic! Sardar also wants to say a rhyming sentence. He tells the British ambassador sitting next to him, "Pass the custard you bastard".
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Sardar: "Excuse me sir, what time is it?"
MAN: "It's 3:15."
Sardar (puzzled look on his face): "You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer."
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A Sardarji father gave the following advice to his son about to be married. "Son, if you want things from your in-laws, be sure to pitch your demand high. If you wanted cycle, ask for scooter; if you wanted motorcycle, ask for Maruti. Always ask for something higher than you need. The young Sardarji, who wanted no dowry, imbibed the lesson. When his father-in-law what he wanted, the young Sardarji replied Give me the girl's mother"
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Two pandits riding on a cycle were stopped by a Sardarji constable. "Don't you know riding two on the back seat is forbidden in Punjab?" asked the constable, " I am going to fine you." The pundits pleaded their innocence of the rules but he refused to let them go. Very exasperated the pandit who was driving the cycle replied, "All right, God is WITH US. Do what you like."
"In that case, I'll fine you for having two on the back seat behind you".
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Once a Sardarji happened to be in a queue at a railway station ticket counter with two men ahead of him. "Ek Punjab MAIL dena" demanded the man in front. He was given a ticket.
Then came the turn of the Sardarji, "Ek Punjab female dena".